Future Haiku Collection

I’m hoping to prepare another haiku collection for release toward the end of the year, I just have to submit it to my publisher and see what they think. So far, it’s shaping up well but I need to spend a fair bit more time on it as I’m trying to add a more…gendai like section.

I’ll be sharing bits and pieces from the as-yet unnamed collection and seeking input from everyone on the cover, as in the past, so hope you can stick around to have a look 🙂

 

skyscrapers –
teeth of the world
leave no bite-marks

 

An Introduction to Haiku – Compositional Techniques 2

Sense Switching

“Sense switching” is a great technique for surprising and delighting the reader. A haiku poet might use it to engage the reader by introducing something unexpected in the poem or to connect two seemingly unrelated events or images. You can do this through careful placement of information across the phrase and fragment. Here, sense switching is illustrated by what’s perhaps the most famous haiku of all, BashĹŤ’s “Old Pond” haiku:

old pond
a frog jumps into
the sound of water

—trans by Jane Reichhold

The poem starts off by focusing on an image—on the visual—but by the end, the sense has been switched from sight to sound.

Again, we see the use of phrase and fragment, where the visual aspect appears in the fragment and sound element appears in the phrase. What’s especially impressive about this haiku is the way the movement of the frog leads to the transition from sight to sound, neatly tying the elements of the poem together and avoiding the “list-like” haiku.

Here’s one of my own verses, featuring the same switch:

through the shutters
a single fly
carries the chug of boats

This poem, while far less graceful, uses different subjects but the same senses. The reader should go from watching the fly pass through the shutters to listening to the chug of boats enter the room.

Narrowing the Focus

“Narrowing the focus” is a similar technique, a change occurs over the phrase and fragment. A haiku begins with a broad description of a scene in the first line, then takes a progressively closer view of something over the following lines (generally the phrase portion of the verse).

This can be seen in the haiku by Graham Nunn, featured earlier in these posts:

distant thunder
each stroke of the oar
stirs the clouds

Line one establishes a broad view before we shift closer with line two, to the moving oar, before the poem finishes with a micro view of the oar tip, as it stirs clouds which have been reflected in the water. “Narrowing the focus” can be achieved if you think of your poem like a camera—begin with an establishing shot, then move to the subject for a close up, and finally an extreme close up where the most telling detail of your poem is revealed.

This technique is favoured by haiku writers seeking to establish an intimacy between subject and viewer, and can be useful in drawing attention to something seemingly insignificant—but which becomes poetic through either its position in the wider world or the lens through which the poet views it. In Nunn’s poem the ripple of the water is both a disruption of the image of the clouds, and a precursor to the approaching storm, a kind of calm that’s depicted as always fleeting.

Shasei

The last technique I’ll explore is Shiki’s theory of shasei. In shasei, the poet attempts to “sketch from life” by writing directly and simply, without a focus on other techniques. Instead, this approach attempts to represent an experience “in the moment”, or an image or a scene “just as it appears”. These types of haiku strive for simplicity and reject artifice (which is especially unappealing in a traditional haiku). Here’s one from Shiki himself:

spring day
a long line of footprints
on the sandy beach

—trans by Yuzuru Miura


It begins very simply by establishing the scene, written as a fact and showing something the writer has observed. This haiku could be reduced to very basic units; spring, day, footprints and sand. When the modifier “long” appears, a sense of time is introduced and we might ask ourselves, “who walked here before me?”

Actually, asking “who walked here before me?” is a useful way to describe the key to shasei—the directly observed experience. To write in this style, the poet personally experiences some sight or moment, then composes it “live”. The poet goes out and sees the footprints in the sand. This is part of the reason why the ginko or “haiku-walk” is popular: The poet actually goes outside, often into picturesque landscapes, and simply walks, unhurriedly, until they see a striking image.

If writing a haiku in the shasei tradition, remember to state what you observe in the simplest of terms.

Amalfi Coast – the ‘chug of boats’

Composing Your Own

Try these techniques and approaches in your own haiku and see if they make a difference. While there are many other techniques out there, and trying them out is important, it’s just as useful to keep your observation skills sharp and to be direct in your expression.

Haiku has a long history and its evolution has sometimes occurred simultaneously in multiple countries. What used to be scripture and what’s current practice can always be bounced off of each other—just as what works in one literary tradition or era won’t always have the same effect here and now.

  • And so instead of counting syllables, count a single breath: Does your poem feel like a mouthful? If so, maybe there are too many words.
  • Remember the phrase and fragment approach, which incorporates the important “cut”—but remember, not all cuts need to be sharp!
  • Remember also that the phrase and fragment is the hinge upon which the haiku’s prosody hangs, and it can further serve as a compositional framework.
  • Instead of searching for the perfect classical kigo, find a referent that suits your culture, your experience of the season.
  • And finally, instead of cramming multiple ideas, images or techniques into one verse, go for something that isn’t overburdened, and something that takes the reader somewhere unexpected.

Thank you

First and foremost to Graham Nunn, for allowing me to quote from his work, for teaching me so much about haiku, and for inspiring my thoughts on the techniques. I’d also like to thank Alex Cabal for helping to get the article up to shape, and for publishing it first, and to John Carley, renku master, for his valuable feedback too!

An Introduction to Haiku – Compositional Techniques 1

Haiku can be tough to write, but they’re worth the challenge, and there are a few techniques that can help during composition.

Juxtaposition

The first technique you can take advantage of—and if you’ve read haiku you’ll have seen it often—is the use of juxtaposition.

Jane Reichhold’s “phrase & fragment” theory is one of the most powerful techniques there is for using juxtaposition in a haiku. It has long been used in contemporary English haiku, and it’s also common in translated works. The theory suggests that a verse ought to be made up of both a phrase and a fragment.

The fragment appears at line one or line three and usually dispenses with articles, while the phrase is made up of the remaining lines—lines two and three, or one and two. You can see this technique in the above examples—some feature it more strongly than others—and you’ll also notice that the “cut” is a vital part of this approach. Below is an example of another BashĹŤ poem, where line one is the fragment:

waterjar cracks—
I lie awake
this icy night

—trans by Lucien Stryk

The lines dealing with his wakefulness make up the phrase of the poem.

Now while this theory is the easiest way to achieve juxtaposition, it more importantly allows the poet to avoid a ‘crowded feeling’ – which can happen when a haiku has too much going on—haiku with something vivid in each line. Haiku with three or more images (or ideas) competing for the reader’s attention often suffer from this feeling of crowded-ness, and they can become list-like. They can also lack an internal relationship between images and ideas.

Juxtaposition thus seeks to compare or contrast fewer ideas, instead bringing them together in a single image. In the following example, one location is described and contrasted with the people visiting it:

church steps
lead to a beggar’s cup
sunburnt tourists

If we were to rewrite this with a more vivid or ‘full’ image in each line, we might end up with something like this:

speckled church steps
a beggar’s empty cup
the chatter of sunburnt tourists

See how it’s become crowded with description, and how the relationship between ideas and images is now unclear due to the list-like appearance? Contributing to this new feeling in the poem is the removal of the phrase and fragment. Further, this re-written version is also too prescriptive in its description; it doesn’t allow the reader to infer information about the scene and its participants.

Here’s another haiku, written by Graham Nunn, featuring juxtaposition:

dawn sky
steam from the lamb’s
throat

As you can see, juxtaposition is achieved by setting one image or idea in the fragment portion and contrasting it with a second, often related, image or idea in the phrase portion of the verse.

By doing this, the haiku avoids overcrowding, retains a sense of lightness, maintains the “cut” or natural pause, and allows the reader to draw the two parts together in their mind. The phrase and fragment approach is also key to many other techniques and will improve the quality of your haiku if you’re facing difficulties keeping the haiku brief, or struggling with achieving either a satisfying internal structure or a sense of connected-ness between images.

(Mizusashi) Edo period waterjar (1615–1868)

Next – sense switching, narrowing the focus and Shasei.

An Introduction to Haiku – Form & Structure: Related Forms

The Haiku’s Siblings


Haiku can be defined by a few general rules if we wish. But if we leave out one of the rules, is what we’ve written still haiku? If not, what is it?

One of haiku’s close relatives is the senryu, which in modern ELH (English Language Haiku) practice is actually often interchanged with haiku. A senryu focuses on humanity and its foibles, and it sometimes possesses a satirical edge. They don’t typically require a kigo, but may mention a season. They’re generally structurally the same as haiku, and often these verses are published as haiku, though dedicated journals and anthologies observe the distinction.

Here’s one from Tominsh, as you can see, there’s no kigo:

losing his job,
the siren sounds
for others to work

—trans by R.H. Blyth

Another form that may appear similar to the traditional haiku is the gendai haiku, a verse which doesn’t feature kigo or even always an imagistic focus on nature or “zen” moments of revelation.

This style of haiku came about during post war Japan, at a time when haiku was a fierce battleground and gendai or “modern” haiku poets were jailed for refusing to fall into line with traditionalists. Their school wanted to move forward while retaining a link to the past, and incorporated new topics, such as surrealism, politics and urban landscapes in addition to new approaches to form, which were not bound by the strict syllable count. Metaphor and simile were sometimes incorporated, something which isn’t often found in haiku (which instead often relies upon juxtaposition). Gendai haiku relates to both a style and a very specific historic period, but it’s sometimes described as ‘innovative’ haiku in English.

Here are three of my favourite examples of gendai haiku, demonstrating the progressive nature of the form. This one was written in 1955 by Kaneko TĹŤta:

like squids
bank clerks are fluorescent
from the morning

—trans by Makoto Ueda

These two are by Hakusen Watanabe:

War was standing
at the bottom
of the hallway

—trans by Keiji Minato

Horses annihilated
spread in the shape
of a swastika

—trans by Keiji Minato

Firefly Squids in Toyama Bay, Japan

Next – a few compositional techniques.

gendai haiku

On gendai haiku – from a master of research and a superb haiku poet in her own right, have a read of this from Melissa Allen.

It’s a great overview of the gendai haiku movement, something which has been fascinating me for months and months now, and includes some startling haiku too

gendai haiku at the Red Dragonfly

Like this one, one of my favourites, a verse from Kaneko TĹŤta

like squids
bank clerks are fluorescent
from the morning

—Kaneko Tōta (trans. Makoto Ueda)

Note the fact that, aside from being an amazing image, it commits one of the great haiku ‘sins’ of simile, well, ‘sin’ from a traditional standpoint anyway.